I was doing some private coaching with members of Character Builders a team from Ohio last week and we got into a conversation on how we make a difference to the team. Whether we are at home or on the job, we carry our energy wherever we go. Further, our thoughts go with us and these thoughts permeate the environment. "In fact," I said, "Thoughts are things."
This led to a pretty lively discussion on what I really meant by this. "What do you mean? Thoughts don't have mass," said one person.
"I always thought that as long as I keep my thoughts to myself and
don't say them out loud, that was okay. In fact, I was being
responsible by keeping my negative thoughts to myself," said another.
And I got her point. You and I have been trained to keep our judgments and negative thoughts to ourselves. As long as we don't say our negative thoughts out loud, we don't hurt anyone. And of course there is a lot of truth to this. You don't want to go around telling everyone what you think of them all the time.
"No way," another person chimed in, referencing back to the original concept. "Thoughts are definitely not the same as things! Things are solid and thoughts are not solid!"
I completely understood where they were coming from. But think about it this way for a moment. It is now well known that we humans only see a small amount on the total spectrum of light. Looking at the image to the right, the range of human sight falls within the vertical lines on the picture. We do not see either the infrared or ultraviolet range of light. http://science.hq.nasa.gov/kids/imagers/ems/visible.html .
So with thoughts, most human beings do not see thoughts. We do know that a few individuals down through history have reported that they have the ability to see the thoughts that people are thinking. But most of us don't see thoughts.
But let me reassert, thoughts are things and sometimes they break through into our consciousness to let us know that we are truly connected to each other. Have you ever had a strange uncomfortable feeling when you walk into a room only to find that the people in the room are having an argument? Or have you ever had the experience of the phone ringing and you know who it is before you look at the caller ID? I'd love to get your feedback on these questions. Let us know your experience with knowing something before you have proof of knowing it.
Just the other day when I was at the NCEA Conference in Anaheim I wandered away from the booth. I got totally engaged in a conversation with someone about 6 aisles away from our booth when suddenly it was as if I'd been hit in my forehead. "Oh my gosh," I apologized. "I have to go. My business partner is calling me back. She must want me to meet somebody." From the look on the man's face, he was stunned by my assertion. I had to laugh at the scene later. He must have thought I was crazy, but it was such a powerful thought that it was almost palpable.
When I go back to the booth, Lynne said, "Where have you been. I kept sending you a thought to come back. I wanted you to meet one of the principals I was talking to."
"Sorry," I said sheepishly. "I didn't get the message fast enough."
Naturally, thoughts don't always break through as powerfully as this. But every once in awhile things like this happen just to let us know that our spectrum of conscious awareness may fall short of the full spectrum of what is available.
In our next blog post, we'll bring our discussion full circle to what this all means to you and me in terms of making a difference in the lives of everyone we meet. I'd love your thoughts on this too!
For now, play with the idea that thoughts are things and that we make a difference and give us your feedback.
I am engaged with a team of people in something called STEM. This advanced alternative is for SCIENCE, TECHNOLOGY, ENGINEERING & MATH buffs who have stood out as exemplary students in any of these areas.
Naturally, I've been invited to teach the leadership portion. The students are at the 7th & 8th grade levels, and what a joy they are!! From visioning to goals and action plans. I taught them the stuff from AN APPLE A DAY FOR YOUR BRAIN April 7 post and RETRAIN YOUR BRAIN March 31 & April 2 posts. They loved it and so did I! Watching these young people awaken to the deep understanding that their destiny is in their hands, was wonderful. Seeing the light in their eyes and hearing their voices as they came up to thank me at the end... It was inspiring to say the least!!!
I am encouraged about the next generation. If we teach well, they will do well and they will serve well!
Aloha for now...
I would love to get your comments on this! Let me know how you feel about our up and coming generation!
I have always experienced a love for children and a commitment to their future and the future of our the world. And because of this my contribution to education has long endured. This commitment lay dormant for nearly 20 years while I worked in the corporate sector training and coaching at every level from the executive to management and their teams of people. That's why the title on my blog page: Success, Satisfaction and Happiness from Classroom to Boardroom. It is meant to highlights the breadth of our work, for our training and coaching programs continue in each area of the business community as well as in the educational arena with programs for principals, educators, students and parents.
This is just a quick follow-up as I just returned home from the NCEA educational conference in Anaheim. Our team, Lisa, Lynne and myself (pictured on the left) worked side by side with the team from Character Builders, Dan, Marisa, and Marie. Character Builders now represents Quest4Character and all of our educational work throughout the continental United States.
It was a great conference. We worked long hours yet the days were magical. There was lots of interest in the product line and our work. But you can't live in a world of all work and no play!!! So we took an evening off. After all, what is Anaheim without Disneyland!?!
The pics are from my favorite ride... "It's a Small World After All"
The spirit of the event was amazing as almost everyone sang along as the boat went through the inner kingdom... Disneyland again lives up to its reputation as the happiest place on Earth!
Our conference in the LA Convention Center with Catholic educatirs from all over the world is a huge success. We have met with and connected with teachers & principals from the U. S. as well as lands abroad. There has been a tremendous interest in a balanced program for IQ, EQ & SQ (Intellectual, Emotional & Social Qualities).
Oops! People are flooding the area... Must go now.
Aloha for now!!
It's time to check out your practice. So how is the habit of making new habits coming? Have you done your Daily Dose of visualization toothbrush in hand? Or has it been a checkerboard experience - sometimes on and sometimes off - maybe even hit and miss?
We're obviously taking about two things here. The first is making a habit of making new habits. That is, remembering to remember to begin your visualization every time you pick up your toothbrush! Use the toothbrush as an anchor. Take your toothbrush in hand and instantly start your Daily Dose envisioning the new state or condition as if you were already there.
The second thing we're talking about is the specific new habit that you happen to be working on at that time. This is vital as the new habit will be the behavioral change you're wishing to instill. This might be anything from being proactive with your To Do list so you get more done on a daily basis, to staying focused when you're listening to your employees or team members.
However, if you simply master the first habit by doing your Daily Dose practice and closing the day with your daily assessment, then you can 'plug in' any behavioral change you wish. You will have gained access to a tremendous new power... the power to change anything you wish to change. In fact, you will have achieved the meta-mastery level of mastering the habit that frees you from being stuck with any habit!
Research tells us that it takes anywhere from 21 to 30 days to create a new habit. I don't know about you, but I shoot for the 30 day mark just to be on the safe side! So pick up that toothbrush and do the Daily Dose.
And BTW (by the way) have fun with it... Do it not as a labor but as the joy of love... the love of improvement, the love of growth and greater success, the love of service to your fellow humans whether at work or in the home. Do it for the love of whatever it is you love and value...
Now let's close the circle in the evening. The day is done. You are ready to close it up maybe do a little reading or watch a bit of TV. So here you are back in front of the mirror, toothbrush in hand.
Have you ever added up the minutes in a life time that we spend brushing your teeth in front of that bathroom mirror? I have.
If I go back just 10 years at 2 minutes in the morning and 2 minutes at night it adds up to 14,600 minutes or approximately 243 hours for brushing alone. And that doesn't include my hair and makeup as a woman or shaving and whatever else you do as a guy!
So I just decided to look at the stats. This is 2 minutes twice a day, morning and evening with my electric toothbrush! Way back before electric brushing, I still took about 4 minutes a day brushing. So what do you think about this?
- 10 years = 14,600 minutes or approximately 243 hours
- 20 years = 29,200 minutes or approximately 486 hours
- 30 years = 43,800 minutes or 730 hours
- 40 years = 58,400 minutes or approximately 973 hours or approximately 40.5 days of your life!
Do you know how many other things we could have done with that time?! If a 2 year old doesn't brush his or her teeth, we say they are learning. But if you don't brush your teeth we refer to it as a social disease!
So if you're going to spend time brushing your teeth, why not increase the value by using the time to retrain your brain for the success you want to achieve in your life?! It seems like a complete no-brainer!
So at night you revisit the day in terms of the vision you wrote on your Ideal Self Card. Ask yourself 3 questions;
- What worked (in terms of my vision) today?
- What could have worked better?
- Where (specifically) do I want to improve tomorrow?
So there we are with a perfect plan for using the neuroplasticity of your beautiful brain to develop yourself in a positive way. Do you want to change your results in the world? Remember: All change begins with self change.
We create our own reality. Look at the reality you have created and check it out. Do you want to keep progressing? And do you want to progress without spending anymore time then you already do? Go to the basin, toothbrush in hand, and start the process today!
And have fun with it. You are the author of your own story. Write it well!! And we'll check back on my next blog to see how you're doing with developing a new habit.
As for me?! It's time for my 2 minute brushing! So I'm going to enter Visualization Nirvana for a moment before I start my day!
And what keeps your brain active and healthy? The joy of learning!
Like the old preverbial apple a day for physical health...the practice you have embarked on is an apple a day for your brain and well being!
So how did you do with your 2 minutes a day plan? Did you do it every day for 5 consecutive days? Did you read and visualize and feel the new state? Did you take control of your destiny and encode the new condition into your brain so that it can begin to show up in your life? Or did you completely blow it on a a couple of days?
Of course, I forgot!! There was a weekend in there! Attempts at change can be a bear on the weekends. Its family and relaxation and fun. I totally get it. If I could count my own fits and starts as money, I'd have a lot of coins in my pocket and cash in my purse. Life happens... and when it comes to family and friends there are times you just gotta go with the flow of it!
So now is as good a day as any to begin again. Lets commence right here where we are mid-week in life.
When you pick up that toothbrush tomorrow, look at your card, read it, and visualize it as if it was already so. See it! Feel it! Hear the voices of people acknowledging you for a job well done!
If your morning brushing is done, visualize visualizing tomorrow morning when you pick up your toothbrush. This isn't so hard, but you have to develop the habit. You'll learn a whole bunch about making new habits from sticking with the process. Remember neuroplasticity: your brain is change-ready!
Take control of your destiny! At any given moment you can shift into a new reality. Practice this little change and the big ones will be easy!
More to come!
It started on Tuesday with events throughout Kailua-Kona and culminated at the Sheraton Keauhou Bay Resort... I like to call it Sheraton By the Sea because this magnificent hotel is surrounded on 3 sides by the ocean.
The evening was all about relationships... old friends and new friends connecting as well as lots and lots of chocolate. It came in every form and dripped from fountains where you could dunk your strawberries and bananas!
For those of you from far away places who have been to Kailua-Kona and to all of our Australian friends... KONA CALLS! May the magic of Kona live forever in your hearts! We await your return to our island in the sea!
For those of you who have not experienced the magic of Kailua-Kona on the Big Island of Hawaii, our Hawaiian music will touch your heart and we will sing you here!
We ended the evening at Huggos - Our home away from home with the beautiful greeting of our waitress....
Aloha Nui Loa....
Time for a clarity check! Is your written statement the exact thing that you want to have in your life? Or is there something in there that isn't quite clear? Read it out loud and feel it. Give yourself a thumbs up or down. If its a down, do a little rewrite until it feels like a YES, THAT'S IT!
As a final double check, make sure it's in the present tense and you are the subject of the sentence. Below are 3 examples you can compare with your written statement to ensure it is 'brain ready'. If it's brain ready your brain will more willingly receive the new habit your are encoding.
Sample 1: I now turn my full attention to my son when he is speaking with me. My heart is open and I am completely still and focused so that I hear and feel what he is wanting me to understand. He feels the caring and connection and it strengthens his sense of confidence and self-worth.
Sample 2: I stop what I am doing and turn to face any person who enters the office to speak with me. I listen with eyes, ears and heart focused on the person and my presence shows that I am engaged with them and care about their input.
Sample 3: I am completely relaxed, calm and patient during rush hour traffic when driving home from work. I use the time to breathe and let go of the day so that I can be calm and present when I walk through the door at home.
Once it matches the sound and feel of the 3 examples above, write your new habit on a card. We use a special card in the training programs called 'My Ideal Self' card, but any 3X5 or 4X6 card will do. Make sure your writing is large enough to read when you are about a foot and a half from it.
You do not have to make time for this. You do not have to add extra time to your already overloaded schedule. I know you're a busy person. So I've devised a system that requires no extra time.
Place the card on the bathroom mirror. Read it every morning while you are brushing your teeth.
I don't know about you but my electric toothbrush has a 2 minute buzzer so I do a 2 minute visualization every morning. It takes me no more time than the time I use for brushing daily!
Read and feel the new habit every day for 5 days and we'll check back to see how you did in 5 days. And have fun with it! This isn't homework... it's retraining your brain for a change you want to make in life!